At the Age of Three

3 years old

There is evidence that there are three main personality types in childhood and the Virtual Child's behavior beginning at age 3 and 4 is designed to resemble one of these personality types. The personality types combine some of the temperamental traits with which you are already familiar. The overcontrolled category refers to a child who is cooperative, and follows the rules, but is shy in social situations and anxious and clingy under pressure. The undercontrolled category refers to a child who is uncooperative or even aggressive, does not follow the rules, is not particularly shy in social situations, and has a tendency to become distracted and overly emotional, particularly when under stress. The resilient category refers to a child who is cooperative and follows the rules, is friendly, non-aggressive and outgoing, is able to focus on tasks without being too distracted, has good regulation of his or her emotions, and is adaptable to new situations.

We have new neighbors two doors down. Alexander Keith has struck up a friendship with the four-year old boy that lives there. They have fun riding trikes on the sidewalk, playing superheroes and villains, and other games.

*Alexander Keith is really interested in playing make-believe now, and likes making his toy figures talk to each other, sometimes as parent and child, and sometimes as two parents. Some of the things the "parent" figure says are amusing versions of things you or your partner have said.

- We want him to know the difference between fantasy and reality, so we encourage other kinds of play with his toys.

From time to time Alexander Keith overhears some arguments you and your partner have about household chores and other issues. During one recent argument you ended up walking out of the house in anger. Alexander Keith started crying, and kept asking for days if you were going to run away.Later, we tried to calm Alexander Keith down, telling him that you would not run away, and not to worry.

My partner finished advanced training 6 months ago and landed a job that pays well.Finances are difficult, and sometimes both of you feel a lot of stress. We are also not comfortable with the crime levels in the neighborhood you live in now and are anxious to move.

*Alexander Keith is OK at playing catch, shooting mini-basketballs and kicking the mini-soccer ball but often quits after a short while, saying, "I'm tired!"

-We encourage Alexander to play soccer and basketball because it's a good chance to develop ball-handling skill and fitness.

Our family has grown with the addition of a baby girl! She was born last night at 11:30 P.M. Alexander Keith is a little over three years old now, and has been eagerly awaiting the baby's birth. Alexander Keith holds and rocks the baby, and even feeds her with a bottle of pre-pumped breast milk or formula. Alexander Keith is fascinated with the baby and tells everyone about her. Alexander Keith likes to imitate Arabella Nichola's sounds and movements, and enjoys play-acting a baby role. He sometimes seems to be regressing and becoming more demanding and whiny, and less cooperative, but other times prides himself on being a competent older sibling.

Since the age of two, Alexander Keith has dawdled on walks around the neighborhood or in the park, and this behavior is increasing. He seems to be curious about every fence, ant trail, leaf or bird, and always wants to stop and look at, touch, or talk about them.

- This is an ideal learning experience for Alexander so we make an effort to ask and answer his questions and explore different places that will be interesting for him

Alexander Keith now seems to have a good idea of how familiar things happen, such as baths and restaurant visits. He often points out when someone doesn't do something in the right order.

- We keep the routines but also expose him to experiences outside our home.

Alexander Keith loves to watch children's educational television. He is learning to name some letters and numbers. He sometimes sings along with the characters on the show, or repeats what they say, but sometimes just sits and watches or plays with his toys in the room.

- The shows he watched on television is a great learning tool for him. We watch the show together having fun.

Alexander Keith is learning the routines pretty well at home and seems to want to please you and other adults, but sometimes he forgets to pick up or he doesn't mind you.

- If Alexander doesn't mind at first, I repeat my request and praise him for helping.

Alexander Keith is not generally able to sit still or stay quiet through an entire meal at a fast food restaurant. You see some other kids of about the same age sitting quietly at the restaurant.

- We will tell Alexander to act in a proper behavior so that he will improve gradually as his attention span and self control increases.

Alexander Keith is fascinated by small animals, and enjoys petting small dogs, cats, bunnies, etc, in the homes of your relatives and friends, as well as the pet store.

- Having a pet is a good idea so we will get one soon. So we let Alexander experience to be with animals showing him to handle and hold them.

Alexander Keith is fascinated by music and sings songs from preschool and from his favorite cartoon shows and movies, and dances in pretty good rhythm to a variety of music, including your favorite "oldies".

- We keep teaching him new songs and enjoy dancing around with the beat of the music.

Alexander Keith's preschool is pretty good, but you've noticed he is hesitant to interact with the other children.

- I think that it is just normal because he is still adjusting to his environment and I believe that he will just get along with the others soon.

Alexander Keith has a couple of little friends at preschool that he has fun with and talks about at home.

- I am happy for Alexander that he is getting along well with the others trying so I expand his experience by letting his friends come over our house.

Alexander Keith likes to tell people about things he has done, but he usually leaves out some key details. We listen to his telling of the story with great interest and ask questions to prompt him to fill in a few details.

Me and my partner have saved enough for a down payment on a place of your own, with help from the relatives.We bundle up your little family and go looking.

Based on our finances, we buy a small, older 2-bedroom condo in the neighborhood we have been wanting to move into over the past couple of years. There is some fixing up to do, which we will get to gradually when you can afford it.This means a change of preschool for Alexander Keith, but hopefully he will not take too long to adjust to it.

Alexander Keith has begun occasionally lying to you about accidents or rule violations (such as sneaking a cookie before dinner). The lies are pretty lame (e.g., there is a trail of cookie crumbs). We recognize this as a sign of a theory of mind, but you wait until we catch him in the act, explain that lying is wrong, and put him in time-out. For good measure, we also explain that being lied to you makes people feel bad.

You have not worked outside the home since Alexander Keith was born. Now that Arabella Nichola is almost 12 months old, and doing well, you and your partner consider the options. You decide

- I will work part time outside under my chosen career so that I can also help in paying the bills. Home daycare will also be good for Arabella.

Alexander Keith has been in preschool for a while and you are curious about his progress. So you hire your friend the early development specialist to do a formal assessment and observation at the preschool during the summer. Based on the testing situation and the observations at the preschool, your friend thought that Alexander Keith was cooperative and friendly with both adults and other children, and able to focus well on tasks. Alexander Keith was quite self-confident in novel social situations and seemed to be well-liked by several children. He had several little friends in the preschool and was somewhat of a group leader in free play activities, such as imaginary play or riding trikes. She recommended that Alexander Keith continue at the same preschool, and that you continue to be affectionate but firm on the rules at home. She thought that this was an appropriate age for Alexander Keith to have little friends over from time to time, or to visit their homes for play dates.

He scored above average on language comprehension and production tests. For example, he was able to tell a detailed and coherent story about a picture. Your friend advised you to continue to read aloud, talk about anything of interest to Alexander Keith and to go on outings of interest to Alexander Keith to stimulate and broaden his vocabulary and knowledge base.

Alexander Keith was below average in understanding quantitative relationships such as "more/less", "longer/shorter", in counting skills, and in solving age-appropriate reasoning tasks. She recommended counting games and other experiences with numerical concepts, as well as discussing how to solve problems (e.g., in putting together a train set) rather than doing it for Alexander Keith.

He performed about average in copying designs, solving picture puzzles, and building block towers to match one made by the examiner. Your friend encouraged you to promote any of these activities that Alexander Keith enjoys.

Alexander Keith's gross motor skills are within the average range, for example, climbing, riding on trikes, climbing, kicking balls and playing catch. Encouraging more of these activities would be a good idea.

You filled out a parenting questionnaire. The developmental specialist reported that your scores indicate you are about average in warmth and affection displayed toward Alexander Keith.

The parenting questionnaire scores indicate you are currently about average in the discipline and control you exercise with Alexander Keith.